going crazy

a picture from our trip to mexico
back in march
kind of wishing i was back there today
i have created some projects for myself
i put myself out there
and people have responded
and now i have so much work to do
and i am just staring at my computer
hoping it will tell me what to do next

interns are starting in two weeks
this is great
but i really want them to have a solid foundation
i want this learning experience to be organized and meaningful
intentional
i don't want to be flying by the seat of my pants
so i am working
hard
to create order
i am not so great with order

i also have some really amazing commisioned projects
due in july
more on that later
pretty weird that this is all happening at once

Over and Out (again!)

here are a few things i did in the last 32 hours!
FUN!

and now . . . we are heading out of town tomorrow
morning for herb's cousin's wedding.
hmmm.
weird to put two possesives in a row.
is that right?
"herb's cousin's wedding"???
at any rate, we are out of here -
milwaukee or bust, baby!

enjoy the rest of your week
c

Making Blueberry Pancakes, Pretend Like It's the Weekend Nooooow. We Can Pretend it All the Time!

For all of you low-carb eaters out there, these pancakes pack in the protein and have very little sugar. We LOOOOOVE them!

Cottage Cheese Pancakes with Blueberries:
1 cup cottage cheese
4 eggs
2 Tbs canola oil
2 Tbs flour
1 container fresh blueberries

Mix all ingrediants, minus the blueberries, to a blender.
Blend until smooth.
For thicker, cheesier tasting pancakes, mix in a bowl using a hand or stand mixer.
(Count on about 15 more minutes of cook time when batter is not blended.)

Pour 1/4 cup of batter onto hot, oiled griddle or pan to make each cake.
Press some blueberries into each cake.
Once the bottom of pancake has begun to firm up, pour a little bit more batter onto each cake; just enough to cover the berries.
Turn and cook on other side.

I normally only make these on the weekend, but when I asked herb to show me how happy he was that i was making these pancakes IN THE MIDDLE OF THE WEEK, this is the priceless face I got:

Totally worth the few extra minutes!!!

DATE NIGHT UPDATE:
The weather cooperated for us - we got some rain in the afternoon,
making the evening all the more pleasent and cool at the gardens last night!
It was so nice to just wander around and talk (or not talk) with herb.
we even smooched a little bit.
i totally don't mind public displays of affection
i actually think it is kind of romantic and fun!
then our friends dave and natalie called us to join them for a drink.
we had reservations at cafe star
so we just asked them to come along with us - which was totally fun and last minute!
great to have them and get the update on their honeymoon and first few weeks as a married couple!
i love date (and double date) nights!

some random information

here is the latest page i made with my Red Velvet Art kit .
rachel and emma are doing a great job with these kits!
if you are not a scrapper, but you sew, check out their may project kit!
CUTE CUTE
CUTIE CUTE-ERSON!
(the word CUTE starts to look funny after awhile)

i have never used kits before
it is challenging
but i really like the gratification that comes
from challenging yourself to use
products you might never choose or put together!
love it!
(it doesn't hurt that rachel is the sweetest thing!
so fun to buy something from someone you like!)

well, i cleaned out my dresser drawers today
just like i have written on my list.
"organize drawers"
done.

but leave it to me to clean them out
sort them out
refold and reorganize them
and leave all of the rubble
(you know the clothes that need to be
given away or put in the basement or just
hung up in the closet)
in a huge pile on the bed.

don't worry herb, it will be taken care of
before you come home.

i am procrastinating
can you tell?
two other things i am avoiding:
i have to call my insurance company
and i need to write client notes
i just don't like either of those things
and apparently it has gotten so bad that my
dresser drawers are now organized and purged
of things that don't fit.

when you start putting things off things you don't
want to do by doing other
things that you have been putting off,
you know you are having "a moment".

i took herb on his "may date" this weekend
(we alternate taking a turn each month to plan a fun date)
after saturday, i am proud to state that
i think i qualify for "most mediocre wife ever"!

why?
well, the date itself ROCKED
breakfast at his favorite place
touring the city in the mini cooper
looking at cool architechture and new lofts
coffee and newspaper
a flee market
and the best . . .
we went to watch a "dance dance revolution tournament"
at the library
(this left a lot to desire, but it was a funny idea
the fact that it was hosted by the library should have tipped me off.
but like the marching band at my high school, our public library system
is one of those things that should be nerdy but is actually pretty cool!)

now, the fact that i am a bonehead sometimes
coupled with the fact that i was not necissarly herb's favorite PERSON
on the planet during out date
(in fact maybe at the bottom of his list at the time)
takes the "awesome factor"
down a few notches
but when you mix it all together,
i figure it qualifies me as:

Most Mediocre Wife Ever

i'll take it.
live and learn
live and learn
and don't be a bonehead to you
sweet husband.
try.
try hard.

other news:
i had my hair colored dark a few weeks ago
i am not sure if this picture is pretty and dramatic
or just sort of creepy,
bordering on "psycho-killer".
you decide.

i love love love it (the hair)!

and we bought this cute new flower pot yesterday

it makes me happy with the marigolds in it
we buy marigolds every year
as a sort of informal, unspoken tribute to herb's mom
(she passed away several years ago)
i like having them right there next to the front door.

here is a picture of my sweet birthday soul sister, aly
my cousin's little girl
we share a birthday
the thing about aly is that she REFUSES to have her picture taken
at christmas, the only half-way decent picture i could get of her
had her finger up her nose
on purpose.

it was only after i asked her to help me take a picture of her dog lucy
that she would show me her face
i think she forgot i wasn't taking picture of the dog anymore.
so funny!


TONIGHT is my april date from herb
(sometimes we get a little behind)
if the weather holds,
we are going to the botanical gardens
and either way, dinner.
sound fun!

and i got my first ever order of Hambly products
this afternoon
if you don't scrapbook, this means nothing
if you DO, then you know i am a little bit excited
to try out these fun papers and overlays!
YES!

okay, i need to go be productive.
really.

i mean it this time.

Counting Down

five days.
and counting.
until the Lazy River . . . (also known as Pirate's Cove)
is opened for another summer of fun!

there are certain things that
i will always think make funny
joke content.
random things.
like pants.
pants jokes will get me
every time.

the other thing that i like to tease
herb about it building a moat around the house.
with a bridge
and crocidiles.

what he doesn't realize
or at least pretends to be oblivious of
is that i SAY moat but what i REALLY mean is
"what would you do if you came home and there was a LAZY RIVER around the house?!?!"
you see, i would call it a moat . . .
because i know it is just quirky and funny enough that herb could get into it
and it would technically be a moat
really it would

minus the crocodiles and henchmen
and add a waterfall streaming down from the bridge.

same thing.

My Latonya

my friend latonya never ceases to amaze me!
she is so inspiring.
her love of jesus really has soaked
into the marrow of her bones.
and then oozes out.
she makes me love him more.

stinky yoga. yummy recipes.

A) last night i went to my first "detox yoga" class.
you might know it as bikrahm or hot yoga.
I call it stinky yoga.
why?
well, 10 people in a 12x12 room set to 80 degrees
equals stinky!

but oh so good for the mind and body!

B) a few weeks ago i asked my friend rachael if i could make dinner sometimes for her family.
why?
because she is 8 months pregnant
with a 3 year old
works full time
has a husband that works full time
and he is also in school.

yeah, i am thinking they need a meal or two thrown their way.
the beautiful thing is she said YES!
she even requested certain dates that she knew she would be extra in need of the help.

i love that!
i mean, i wouldn't have asked if i didn't want to do it.
but so few people ever take me up on those kinds of offers

i appreciated the vulnerability it took rachael to accept my help.

and now for the yummy food:

The Only Sandwhich you Ever Need to Know (by cara harjes)
8 slices garlic peppercorn bakery bread
1 apple (granny smith)
1 lb. sliced deli turkey
1 round of brie cheese
olive oil

brush bread with olive oil; both sides
lightly toast bread on a pan in the broiler (watch closely so as not to burn)
place 3 slices of turkey on four pieces of bread.
top with thin slices of apple and then brie cheese.
toast again (carefully) under broiler in oven to melt the cheese.
place remaining four slices of toasted bread on top of the sandwhiches.


The Salad:

salad mixed greens
1 bosc pear
1/4 cup pecans; toasted and chopped
1 package gorganzola cheese
1/2 cup dried cranberries

The dressing:

1 cup fresh basil
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 cup apple cider vinegar
1 cup canola oil
2- 4 cloves garlic (depending on your taste)

Mix dressing ingrediants in the blender.
Chill dressing in refridgerator.

words i (re) learned

last week i took some pictures of my beautiful friend stacy and her amazing new little bebe . . .
hutch.

i have to say,
everytime i take "real" pictures
i gain more and more respect for people
who do this professionaly.
dude - it is HARD!

but i think this handful turned out pretty well.

if you have any input (constructive) feel free to drop me an email or leave a comment.

timely

(sitting in the basement of kelly jackson . . . getting ready to mapquest directions to my cousin's house . . . because even though i have been to kansas city countless times since i was a newborn babe . . . i have NO idea how to navigate this town!)

i have been full of new creativity lately.
little baby blooms
waiting for me to let them burst
into something
colorful and
loud
or soft
or whatever they want to be
whatever they need to be

and it is easy to have ideas
and before you let them out of your mouth or hands or feet
you decide what they are
what they can do
and if they are worthy.

it reminds me of the time i walked through
downtown denver
with my friend andy
(by the way, everyone needs an andy)
and i told him
after my first date with herb
why it would never work
why he would not like what he saw
why my homebody ways and my inability to
remain awake past 10 pm would chase him away
why it was not going to work.
why herb was going to decide it would not work.

and then andy did what all true andy's do well
he stood on a city street bench,
hovering above me
and he told me i was not aloud to decide
for herb
what herb
would decide to think about me.

scary, huh?

yep.

but i did it.
i let me be me.
and i let herb decide what he thought.

turns out he likes me.

so come to me
little ideas
little baby ideas
clever baby ideas
colors and sounds and feelings and dreams
come decide what you will
come say what you will
i won't decide for you.


The real reason i started this entry today . . .
to share this quote i found . . .
at kelly's house.
on her desk.
the one i sat down at 15 minutes ago to mapquest directions to my cousin's house . . .

"each person is created to see a different facet of god's beauty - something no one else can see in quite the same way - and then to bless all worshipers through all eternity with an aspect of god they could not otherwise see."

thanks for that, mr. c.s. lewis

love,
cara

O.U.T

Out.
That is what I am.
In Missouri.
Visiting family and my best friends.
Missing Herbie.
But you know what they say about distance.

Hope to have some fun pictures to share when I get back - hacking around with the camera lately. Man, it is NOT easy to take great pictures.
Next stop, learn how to use Photoshop!

But first, family time and that fantastic river rock massage tomorrow! YES!

What have YOU been looking forward to lately???

studies show that guest bedrooms given exposure to the arts are 4 times less likey to smoke cigarettes and find more success in school.

WARNING: if you hated your wedding album or pictures DO NOT read any further!

you have heard me talk about my friend kelly here before.
she is amazing.
what is also amazing is the wedding pictures and album she put together for us.
before kelly introduced me to her work a few years ago, i was only familiar with the old school
wedding album . . .
a handful of 5x7s
a few 8x10s
put them into cardboard matted slots and call it a day.
what a lovely way to caputure that moment when you both put your hands
with new wedding rings in place
on top of his boutinere
or her heirloom hanky.
it really caputures the moment.

well, i am sure kelly would agree.
but she when she started taking pictures
she decided to let the 8x10 wedding picture people do what they are good at
and she started doing everything else!

she is a machine.
she stops at nothing to capture the tear right as it comes out of the brides eye
she has been known to lay belly down on a sand beach in order to get the right angel

enough said.

anyway, after months of negotiations with the company who prints and assembles her albums,
kelly was finally able to send us our album this spring!
here are some snippets.

ps - kelly also took our friend latonya's wedding pictures. latonya is a nicer human being than i, so she is actually careful to only show her album to people that liked THEIR pics . . . because she knows it is so beautiful and she wouldn't want anyone to feel sad.

you can't help but smile

me. today.

drinking: water

reading: "girl in the mirror" and "queen bees & wannabes"

learning: why are ALL of my adolescent female clients trying to hurt themselves?

wondering: am i going to be ready when my internship team starts in june? do i have what it takes to teach them how to be good therapists?

listening: the weepies

wearing: dark jeans and a "librarian-sexy" see through blouse with poofy sleeves and a tie around the neck. black mary janes.

temperature: chilly but nice fresh air coming through the window

location: my tiny little office in the city - love it!!!!

outlook: hopeful

excited about & grateful for:
* new car to replace our leased car that we are turning in next week -
she is deep red-ish orange and i named her daphne because she is sleek and svelt . . . like a 40's pin-up girl.

* going to visit my lovely sister and girlfriends in kansas city next week! i get to follow kelly around while she shoots a wedding! so so so excited to learn from her magical ways!

* nothing ever stays the same. in the case of marriage, this is proving to be a very delightful truth!

* i ordered my mothers day gift two weeks ago! it will be arriving at her home sometime next week! yes! i love it when i am organized!

* my gran gosney is coming to stay with us for 4 or 5 days next month!

* summer in denver is amazing! can't wait for the farmer's markets, outdoor movies, hiking, and more and more and more!

* i turn 30 in 2 months and one week! . . . starting to wrap my head around that a little bit! unlike my 25th (which was seriously traumatic for me), i am actually pretty excited and feeling good about it all!

* i have been scrapping and making art without feeling guilty about all of the "wasted" time that i am not cleaning the house or doing "real" work!

* going to a wedding tomorrow night! delighted to be a small part of their story of love and redemption!

* making new friends in denver! lots of quality women are popping up in my world these days!)

* i am learning to CHOOSE joy and happiness everyday!

I Like Rocks ***elsie challenge***

today, elsie flannigan did a challenge over at creating keepsakes .
the idea was to scrap a page about something you find beautiful . . .
something that is simple and ordinary and everyday.

there are so many things . . .
kids playing on the playground
the flowers in my front yard
the vintage looking label on the brand of coconut milk i buy . . .
my husband's silly smile that he makes after he has made a joke and is waiting for the perfect pause in the conversation to say his next joke . . . .
the beautiful old wooden floors in our home . . .
so many many things . . .

but there is one thing that came to mind front and center -
(maybe because i had a picture printed and ready to go!?!?!)

the truth is . . .
i really love rocks.
when i go somewhere special, i pick up a rock.
when i am having a hard day, i pick up a rock.
if there is something i want to be sure to remember,
you get it . . .
ROCK!

we have a small and growing menagerie of these memories on our window sill.
there is the flat, round one i picked up one day and sat on the top of my computer at work - i wrote "strength" on it (just as a little reminder that god is my rock and my strength)
then there is the one my sister picked up on a walk back in 2003 over thanksgiving - when we celebrated our last holiday with our beloved aunt sara a few weeks before cancer took her body.
there is the heart shaped one i picked up in hawaii for herb the first time i realized i was in love with him . . .
and the little tiny castle shaped one from our honeymoon that reminded me of the watch towers that dotted the amalfi coast (you know, to protect the city from pirates!?!?!?!)
. . . our most recent addition is the two small white shiny stones we gave to each other during a ritual at the marriage conference this weekend.
it is my version of a modern day karin (not so sure of the spelling on this one)
the way i understand it, "karin" is the irish practice of stacking stones to mark a special moment or place or time.
ancients used to collect and stack rocks when they found some sort of victory.
the isrealites used to pick up a stone when god showed himself faithful . . .
then when they started to wonder where he was again . . .

(and i understand this can happen from time to time
when a three day trip ends up taking 40 years
and your god may or may not show up
in the form of a cloud, a bush, or an ass.)

. . . they would just pull out their rock and remember his faithfulness,
trusting that he will indeed be faithful again.
personally, if i was living a nomadic lifestyle, i am not so sure that my first thought would be "rock!"
but hey, they where under a lot of stress . . .

so, there you go.
a little random tidbit about what makes me tick.
rocks.
they remind me to god's faithfulness,
things i am thankful for,
and things i hope for.