2.02.2009

The Marriage Mix

Three years ago, I was a newlywed who was quickly realizing that marriage is not easy.
There were so many surprises and funny stories that popped up everyday.

So, I began this blog: I Do WHAT????
For the first few months, I wrote stories about marriage
and everything I was learning about it.

After a few more months it got hard.
I mean really hard.

Things started to crumble, inside and out.
I stayed at home as much as possible.
I avoided phone calls.
It took me 8 months to even tell my mom
that my fairy tale marriage was coming apart at the seams.

Very quickly, this blog became an escape.
Instead of chronicling my marriage here,
I used it as a place to focus on the "pretty things" in life.
Pictures, vacation tales, art making and recipes got logged here.

But now we are have been doing this thing (marriage)
for more than three years.
And things are better.
Not perfect.
But better.
Much
much
much
better.

And during the tough days,
when I was at a complete loss for stories of hope
and encouragement,
I was terrified that people who had it as bad as we did
had only one choice -
to get a divorce.

We did not want to leave our marriage,
so we worked hard to find another option.
This looked a lot like
crying
yelling
crying some more
talking
talking
talking
until
we had to sleep.
letting friends
listen
and
encourage.
crying
talking
yelling
talking.

It took a lot of hard work, prayers, and tears.
It is not a strategy, formula, or magic spell.
But it is a testament that tough marriages don't have to end.

And now I want to provide that sense of
hope
and
encouragement
to others.

You can find that in my new blog
(this time, it really WILL be about marriage)
The Marriage Mix

This blog is not going anywhere.
I will still post silly stories,
thoughts on faith,
ridiculous bed head photos,
and my adventures in the kitchen
on this blog!

In the meantime, go check out my new blog.
Be sure to visit often this week,
as I will be making changes and improvements.
And please, let me know what you think -
I would love your feedback!

4 Comments:

Blogger Deb said...

So so true. It seems it is too easy to forget that relationships take TIME, some times even just time passing and just being together. We had a bad year last year, but during a time we were barely talking or touching, we must have as our surprise baby is due in 9 weeks (I'm 40!!) she will be a living reminder of the fact that although relationships are hard hard work, good things come as well. Good luck and well done with perservering. By the way I enjoyed the pretty things too!!

1:19 PM, February 02, 2009  
Blogger Sharmaine said...

Wow Cara! GOOD ON YOU BOTH!!! I am so glad you both saw the potential in your marriage and didn't loose hope in it's worth. The "talking until we had to sleep" thing rang so true to me.
Hugs and proud of you for sharing and just had to tell you :)

4:23 PM, February 02, 2009  
Blogger Deanna said...

CARA!
I am so inspired by you, ya know. I think it takes a lot of guts to do what you are doing with your new blog. it will be so helpeful to so many, married or not. so Congrats adn goodl uck there...not that you'll need it!

but also,
your art is found prompt... holy moses.
I had tears in my eyes. really. I am absolutely at a loss for words. but it moved me.

love to you and all you do. one day soon we should talk. about fun stuff, like living in colorado and such. ;)

1:28 PM, February 03, 2009  
Blogger MandieGirl said...

I just went over to your new blog and it seriously gives me so much hope. thank you so much, and I am really looking forward to reading more.

12:41 AM, February 04, 2009  

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